Friend or foe?!

Coeworkers…friends or foes?!

I dont know really. I mean I start with having them all in the foe category then they are given the minimal chance of growing and graduating from this foe zone. FOEZONE (its my word, you cant use it, make up your own shit).

But wouldn’t the smartest choice is to be cordial and keep a safe distance so that you can’t get stabbed in the back by some piece of shit jealous of you amazing amaze-ballness?! Ha? Ha? HA?

The problem is that i like some of my coworkers

I don’t know!

I love you all some kore than others

Marital advice

I dont know whether giving marital (i mean marriage i hope its a word) is ever a good idea especially if like me you’re unmarried and single

Its very tempting to dish out especially if asked but then it can quickly backfire and end up with a long lasting awkward “moment” one that is very difficult to pass or ignore

I mean you also might me as wise as i am full of sound and sage advice but maybe unless you’re in the oppressive “golden cage” you would be seen as full of shit

I guess what i want to say is dear married people refrain from asking the subject matter advice because:

1- no one cares as much as you since its your marriage
2- its private
3- more often than not all you are really asking for is blind agreement which lets face it is a lot to ask

I love you all, some more than others

The Meat Grinder Theory

What constitutes strength?

How do you determine that someone is a strong person? I am always told that I am strong but I believe that I am a very weak person.

I’m loyal, I’m responsible. When given the reigns of anything I make sure to stear it to the right end point.

When faced with a catastrophe I immediatly morph into Super Shwaish and fix the situation. I handle my business so to speak, but on a personal level the littlist most insignificant issues tear me apart.

TO SHREDS!

Especially if they have anything to do with emotions.

Emotions are my kriptonite and I am an insanely emotional person. The only way for me to handle my emotions is to clobber them to death then mince them in the meat grinder, feed them to my cat, euthenize my cat, then mince the corpse in the same meat grinder then sell it to some poor unsuspecting slob for chicklets, wait a few days, hunt down that unsuspecting slob, kill him, frame the person who triggered the emotions, then brush my teeth and go to bed.

THAT IS HOW MUCH I HATE EMOTIONS.

Anyway, i love you all some more than others.

How Could You?

How could you look your victim in the eye?

How could you be the cause of so much pain and heartache and still be okay with yourself?

How could you hug them?

Talk to them?

Look at them?

Pretend that it never happened?!

Im not much of a judgemental person (I should start though)but you should at least have the decency to be ashamed, or at least fake it.

i love you all, the shameful more than others

A 27 Year Old Saudi Baby Girl

That’s what I feel like when I have to ask permission from my dad to leave the house and see my friends

That’s what I feel like when my “men” are protecting my honor all the while committing much worse offenses to/with other “mens” “women”

That’s what I feel like when I get into a car accident go to the police station to finish the paperwork and get yelled at by the police man asking me “where my father, brother or uncles are?”

That’s what I feel like when I am having to run after my father to get my passport renewed

That’s what I feel like when my “men” complain about the way I dress, speak, think

That’s what I feel like knowing that at this stage I am as “free” and “independent” as I’ll ever be for a very long time

The Saudi cloud of female oppression looms over my head even when I’m not physically there

I feel like I am living in a bigggg ball, that has a very clear exterior, one which I can roll around in, roaming around, thinking I’m in control only to have one of my “men” bounce me back to my place

They don’t do it out of any guile , or hate, or oppressive tendencies, they do it because they do not know any better and that is truly what they think should be done in order for me to remain the little doll that they keep all shiny , angelic and sweet looking

I love you all, my “men” more than others

Shwaish 2.0

Good morning

It’s me again. Shwaish. Used to have a “Screw the Princess…She’s dead” princessdom blog? I deleted it ALL twice because people from my real life kept on finding me on my “real-er” life, where everything is transparent and I desperatly and devestatingly lack a filter? Remember me? No? Well then fuck you, man.

Anyway its been at lease 6 months since I completly and utterly disappeared from the blogging world and something peculiar came out of that. Since I no longer had my little private niche in cyberspace where I can go ahead and vent and dump on everything in life, I started doing that with people…FACE TO FACE and that sucked. Not because of the people I’m venting to but because I dont think I’m emotionally mature enough to hear or infer that “no one cares”. I mean dont get me wrong, I know no one cares here either but at least here , on my blog, I can just delete the offending comment or rationalize it by saying that you guys dont know me enough to really matter (sorry!) but hearing or seeing or infering the “no one cares” face to face is a killer.

Long story short, I’m back

I love you all, some more than others